Dad Builds $3,000 Chicken Coop To Get 16 Cent Eggs For Free

[Sahara]

The original post is satire, people. C’mon.
However... we pick blueberries. Blueberries don’t grow here, we have to drive fifty miles each way to find them. Yet nearly every autumn since 1972 I have been to the same spot picking them.
Here’s how it goes: wife, daughter, and I generally get off work around 05:00. We stop at the gas station to fill up and grab fried chicken and iced tea for road food. Drive an hour to the spot. Pick for around three hours, then drive the hour home. Some years it’s good and we get about an ice cream pail full. Some years a handful. We make three to five trips per season. It’s not uncommon to look up see a bear looking at us with curiosity. One time we saw seven. I carry a 12 gauge but have never needed it.
So we are looking at about fifty bucks for gas, twenty for road food, and five hours of time to pick anywhere from three to thirty dollars worth of blueberries. We love it. Neighbours and friends vie for a chance to come out. Here’s why. It’s a chance for at least three people with busy, hectic lives to get together and chat during the driving portion. The picking is a zen sort of meditative activity. You are away from stress and civilization, in a silent forest, gathering, contemplating, decompressing. Doing stuff that most people don’t get the opportunity to do, in a part of the world most people never get to see. In February, when it’s forty below and dark there is a great satisfaction in whipping up a batch of pancakes and throwing in a few handfuls of the blueberries. Some times we will throw the side by side on the trailer and bring it, exploring the miles of abandoned roads from a defunct mine.
There will come a time when physically we can no longer do this, or if the natives win their land claims and toss out the white people. Then we will look back on these times fondly.
I think and hope that raising urban chickens is like that, and not just a way for millennials to try to be farmers. Farming is hard.

 

[Kern Dog]

Almost every year, I go to a swap meet in Reno Nevada during their Hot August Nights festival. At that swap about the only thing I find to buy is lug nuts and cleaning supplies that I could buy cheaper elsewhere.
I don’t like to leave without buying something.

 

[chtampa]

My defense would be that the chicken was crossing the road and I build a pen to protect it. Then I would expect the HOA to prove why it crossed the road into my yard. Likely there is no precedent.

 

[Sahara]

Just tell the HOA that they are homeless chickens. If it’s like here they will be allowed to do whatever the hell they want and be protected from harm by law. Get free food and medical care. And they would smell better and **** less in my yard then human homeless.

 

[Budnicks]

SATIRE people. SATIRE.

 

[Gus chiggins]

February 17th, 2022
View attachment 1241972

BIRMINGHAM, AL—According to sources, local dad Dave Manheart recently completed a project that will help enable his family to save money on groceries. After much research and 10 weekends of hard labor, Dave has succeeded in constructing a backyard chicken coop. With a small investment of just $3000 on lumber and supplies, he now can get 16¢ eggs for free.

"With the supply chain issues and inflation, it's important to be independent," said Manheart. "Plus, this new chicken coop will look really great on my wife's Instagram feed, which is what this whole thing is really about."

Local witnesses described Manheart's pride in the newly constructed chicken coop as “really cute.” His wife assured reporters that they will enjoy eating ten eggs a day since they are free.

After leveling a spot in the backyard with a backhoe Dave rented for just $500, putting together the coop was fairly easy and only resulted in two trips to the emergency room with accidental injuries. “Dave says his back will be fine now that he’s no longer lifting lumber, and the doctors had no problem re-attaching his finger,” said his appreciative wife Deb.

“Daddy bought the cutest little baby chicks!” said his little girl. “But then our dog Buster ate them so we had to get new chicks.” The dog now has an $800 invisible fence to keep him away from the chicken coop.

“That was totally worth it,” said Dave as he proudly surveyed his handiwork.

At the time of publication, the homeowners association had issued a fine of $500 for the unapproved chicken coop.

He sounds like just the man to be in charge of top secret sensitive documents.

 

[Fran Blacker]

18750 eggs to cover building costs never mind other costs. Guy dies of heart disease at 18749 eggs from cholesterol clogging his heart.