Kids today.

[BeepBeepRR]

I don't know your wifes family history but it sounds to me like he is still punishing his mother because his birth father is not around, some kids get a warped idea/chip on their shoulder over that even if the guy died. In any case he needs to be called out on it. I had a neighbor and her husband died of cancer, one son never got over blaming her, screwed with everybody, joined a gang, never accepted his step father, ended up beating his mother to a bloody mess, the other 2 kids were fine. Women are angels in these situations for sure, always forgive these actions, kids are lucky in that respect. He needs an azzkicking for treating his mother like that.

Naa he knows his real dad is a pile of dog crap. I think he just has no sense of gratitude. He is more into video games at 24 than anything else. I guess he was expecting more games. Either way it was a bullshit way to talk to his mother.

 

[WAYNES WORLD]

We quit buying the kids gifts. Only the grandkids. There was no gratitude just attitude so we said no more and our life is mush easier.

 

[Ron H]

Sorry to hear that, i probably mentor/give advice too much.

I’d say don’t forego the advice; some of it is likely sticking more than you realize. Some years ago my daughter said she saw a deer running in front of her across the road and says “I remember what you said if you see one deer good bet there will be more…and there were two more that followed the first one.” I told her this some years before and no clue if she got the tip or not, glad she did.

My dad was not one for idle chat; but he expected us to have brains to figure stuff out and when we did something stupid there was no yelling or smacking…he’d ask “What were you thinking?” Lol and he wanted an answer – “I don’t know” didn’t qualify an acceptable answer. But, again to your point, some stuff I believe ‘sticks’. Example was after I got into some trouble with the police in my ‘Cuda, he gave me a brief lecture staring with “You think life’s a game…?” Remember those words like he said them yesterday half a century + later.

 

[Moparnocar]

We quit buying the kids gifts. Only the grandkids. There was no gratitude just attitude so we said no more and our life is mush easier.

Interesting...i have a 8 yo son that doesn't show gratitude if he doesn't like it

 

[440 4 speed]

Interesting...i have a 8 yo son that doesn't show gratitude if he doesn't like it

OH BOY!!!

 

[Moparnocar]

OH BOY!!!

Yep, working on it... Hes a great kid, just has very strong emotions, when hes happy, hes a blast. He's learning

 

[Pops1967GTX]

Kids will never know about making Ice Cubes, the tray, the taste of stale ice cubes…the dad saying don’t use the cloudy ones…

 

[eldubb440]

can't believe I didn't comment on this one .......... I'm not fond of children, unless they have 4 legs and a waggy tail

 

[themechanic]

can't believe I didn't comment on this one .......... I'm not fond of children, unless they have 4 legs and a waggy tail

If you raised your children by the Bible and they live God and you then you will have someone you can rely on in your old age, should the need arise. Fido can't.

 

[eldubb440]

If you raised your children by the Bible and they live God and you then you will have someone you can rely on in your old age, should the need arise. Fido can't.

I don't have any kids, I'll have to take my chances

 

[themechanic]

I don't have any kids, I'll have to take my chances

I'm sorry about that. My kids would be glad to help anyone in your case who never had a family.

 

[BeepBeepRR]

Well, here is an update to the story. Him and his girlfriend broke up. But not before finding him a job in Michigan with a friend of hers and room and board until he gets established. Well that didn't go too well and the couple he was staying with decided to get a divorce and they told him he had to leave. So Guess who is back living here at the house? On top of that his girlfriend broke up with him and started I guess messing around with his friend and former room mate. I don't see how my son found her attractive let alone a second person on this Gods Green Earth. Anyhow he's back here and sleeping on the couch. Because the day he moved out I ripped his bedroom apart and recovered my garage space. I had previously built him a decent size room in the back end of the garage complete with power, cable, built in desk and a nice closet. That's all gone now and he asked me if I could build his room back lmao. He must be nuts.

 

[Pops1967GTX]

 

[Darter6]

Boy do I remember those days ^^^^^^ We would do group rides on Harley's.
My brother-in-law would set his 2 year old on the gas tank and do day long rides.
The kid loved it ! even falling a sleep in his dad's lap with his helmet resting on the tank.

 

[Coelacanth]

Sometimes parents can be their own worst enemy these days. Give give give leads to take take take, and expectations and entitlement. You bought your son a few cars? I wonder how many of our generation (I'm 56) and older got gifted cars when we were young. I imagine it's fairly few, and that most of us had to work to earn the money to buy our first car. I'm totally against gifting cars to children because they bypass the whole earning/hard work stage and don't learn responsibility. I had classmates with rich daddies who bought cars for their kids when they turned 16 or 18 or whatever and those kids turned out spoiled. You don't learn the value of something unless you had to sacrifice to earn it.

I'm sorry to hear about your situation but it sounds like you were far too generous and giving, of course all well-meaning, but got taken advantage of by your son. Now it's kind of late to teach him an important lesson, because the valuable learning moment long ago passed, but it's time for a reality check and tough love. And you have to cut the generosity.

Good luck, no doubt parenting can be a pain!

 

[padam]

I love my boys more than my own life, but damn, manhood isn’t what it used to be. But then again I feel I’m half the man my dad was.

 

[zyzzyx]

Just remember that you didn't do anything rite and you didn't do anything wrong. Our Kis are shaped by life
and the people that that hang with. They are their own person weather they are a Brain Surgeon or an Inmate!
Some excel, and some fail. That's life. We can only hope they turn out good.

 

[Detective D]

Well, here is an update to the story. Him and his girlfriend broke up. But not before finding him a job in Michigan with a friend of hers and room and board until he gets established. Well that didn't go too well and the couple he was staying with decided to get a divorce and they told him he had to leave. So Guess who is back living here at the house? On top of that his girlfriend broke up with him and started I guess messing around with his friend and former room mate. I don't see how my son found her attractive let alone a second person on this Gods Green Earth. Anyhow he's back here and sleeping on the couch. Because the day he moved out I ripped his bedroom apart and recovered my garage space. I had previously built him a decent size room in the back end of the garage complete with power, cable, built in desk and a nice closet. That's all gone now and he asked me if I could build his room back lmao. He must be nuts.

Unless you make him pay rent he is going to sleep on your couch forever. He won;t pay rent? Hand him the electric bill and phone/internet bill and tell him they are his responsibility or get out. He is 24, he has no right to stay.
I agree with Coelacanth about the cars. I bought my son a 17 year old Impala with 140k miles on for his first car. It was in nice shape. I told him he was responsible for every single thing on it, insurance, gas in it, oil changes, repairs, plates. I also told him if he wants a different car he has to buy it but he isn't selling my car or trading it in, I needed it for his sister to drive.

Sounds harsh I know, telling your kid to pay rent. But the schools and the internet do not teach kids how to be adults. They are constantly told they shouldn't have to work, should get free money(UBI) and have everything nice when they are 15, because "other people have it".
Hippies, basically.
Your son will be a hippy, until you stop him from being one.

Oh, and it is fine if he lives at home..... if he has a job and proves to you he is saving money. I let both my kids do that because I am a blue collar guy with no money to pay for a school for them or otherwise. But I could "pay their utilities" (under my roof) so long as they proved to me they were trying to better their position in life. The interesting thing with that is with where wages are for things, kids with no bills and a fll time job can save to pay cash for a modest house in like 4-5 years. Our society is so debt driven that when you remove the debt the wages actually make sense. But that is a different discussion.
I wish you the best, I hope your kid wakes up.

 

[cosgig]

I’ve always tried my best to be in my kids lives. Field trips, coaching sports, horse shows, teaching them how to be independent. As a father, I never felt like I was getting through to my son, and my motto was always “you have to tell them 1000 times and hope they hear it once”. I started him out the old fashioned way, with the lawnmower. Learn to start it, put gas in it, check the oil, mow the lawn, and get pod for it. Then we moved up to the mini bike, you can start it, you can ride it. Then motorcycles, then his first car. Well, he must’ve been listening, at least a little, because when the beater died I bought him a 1986 Dodge truck that had been sitting for over a decade. All of a sudden we were a team, and got the old truck back on the road. He loves that truck and is doing his own maintenance, and has had his buddies over and helped them with their cars too. I had a couple proud moments when for his birthday opened the tool boxes in the garage and made him his own set of tools. Although he still has his high school pizza job, I’m hoping he finds his way to a career path, at least he’s the Manager at the pizza place. He doesn’t drink, he vapes but I can’t say much about that, and although I didn’t think I was getting through to him, it seems as he was listening. So, don’t give up on those young people, there’s hope for them yet. My son is 20, seems he caught on a little earlier than I thought.

 

[1967coronet]

The thread title said ( kids )
at 24 he is no kid. He does owe you folks a apology.
He would no longer be welcome in our home until that took place.
When your young you are granted a few mistakes to learn by. This should be one.
Up to him now how his life plays out.
Step son , blood son, complete stranger, nobody dis respects my wife.