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When my dad would be using a tool that wasn't working properly he would always say "I wish the guy that made this had it shoved up his *** and we'd both be tickled."
"If you tell a lie big enough and keep repeating it, people will eventually come to believe it. The lie can be maintained only for such time as the State can shield the people from the political, economic and/or military consequences of the lie. It thus becomes vitally important for the State to use all of its powers to repress dissent, for the truth is the mortal enemy of the lie, and thus by extension, the truth is the greatest enemy of the State.”
"I wish I could buy him for what he is worth and sell him for what he thinks he is worth." I can think of a least 2 or 3 US presidents this applies to.