New Years celebration in the holler...

[oldbee]

Ear protection.......Huh? What?

 

[Cranky]

Relocation out of the question then?

With all the crap I still have, a move will be labor intensive. Also would have to be able to close a deal on my house at the same time of finding another place since there's not much cash to float a transition between properties.

 

[Photon440]

It's always been sort of funny out here in the holler around New Years time.
If anyone ever needed reminded of the difference in what is "normal" and tolerated
in the SE, particularly in rural areas, as opposed to more populated areas of the world,
one need only be present in one of a thousand hollers like ours at midnight on Dec. 31.
Tonight was no exception....

Background:
I'm a transplanted "city boy" (grew up in Atlanta in the 60's/70's, high school in the DC suburbs after that +20 years there) who "ain't from around here" as they like to say.
Out here, we're situated on the side of a ridge in a holler that faces WNW; the view is
50+ miles or so on a clear day.
This holler (like most in these parts) has a highway of sorts down the middle of it, usually sitting right next to a small river or major creek, what have you.
We have neighbors, but not like in neighborhoods in the conventional sense - more like nearest one is over 1/4 mile away or more. As such, we're oftentimes facing one another from a goodly distance across these hollers.
As you might imagine, 2A abounds out here - not unusual to hear someone target shooting on a given day and I've been here long enough to have gotten to know some of the others out here who are fellow enthusiasts.
The good guys with guns know where each other are - and consequently, the bad guys know, too. Not much worry about anyone coming up this ridge unannounced...

Ok, given all that, you can imagine what the typical New Years celebration is like out here.
Sounds sort of like a friendly war zone, if ya catch my drift....

To add to this evenings' festivities, someone had rented out the neighbors' place (they half-*** a B&B over there sometimes) and it had been quite apparent the renters were not "from around here" either - seemed like two couples, acting like they'd been let loose from whatever restricted part of the world they came from.
They'd even splurged and bought FANCY fireworks, the high-dollar kind that has professional launchers, big elevation and noisy types - and they'd bought a lot of it.
Then around 11pm came the obligatory drunken 4-wheeler rides up and down the property... which finally got my attention when they would come over close to the fence line near our garage and just sit there, staring...
"Come see the native TN redneck in his natural habitat!"
Like we had signs hanging up or something... they were fascinated.
Well, until their next trip around anyways - which found me out in the garage this time, garage door up, me with a big ol' weapon up on the bench, "cleaning" it.
They seemed to lose their fascination at that point....

Midnight approaches and some of my neighbors and myself begin our traditional boom-booms, where we "answer" each others' gunfire with our own at the strike of the New Year.
It starts out with small arms, then escalates in boomy-ness until one "victor" is declared by the others ceasing fire.
It's quite hilarious to us - must sound borderline retarded to anyone else except those in rural areas.
Well, wouldn't you know it? Our temporary city slicker type renters next door wanted to play this year too!
Ok, let's go....

22's ring out at midnight exactly, followed by handgun caliber stuff. This side of the ridge, repost from the opposite side, Buford down the road next, lather rinse repeat....
We're having a blast as usual, but the interlopers insist on ruining things with their stupid fireworks, messing with the whole rhythm of the thing - and their fireworks always had loud reports at the zenith of each ones' climb in elevation, too.
We neighbors continue, ignoring the interlopers, increasing the boom with each reply up to the point we had the really noisy stuff out - 308's, AR this, AK that, shotguns next....
Finally the neighbor with the 10ga "Jed Clampett" gun rips one off, which usually signals the end of the festivities - but nooooooo, not this time.
Bad guests let go with the mother of all their fireworks, followed by them laughing like hyenas that I could hear all the way up here.
Hmmmph...

Neighbor Randy across the holler texts me just then and just says "DEFCON 4?"
I simply answer back "yep".
Well, what followed next quickly ended the premature celebration of our "guests" next doors' braying like donkeys....
I hear Randy let loose with a few rounds of his Barrett. I waited for that to sink in, then replied in kind - as did a few of the others with theirs (there's at least a half dozen of those out this holler that I know of), each in turn.
(See, we don't like to do such things typically - what with the cost of ammo for these critters and wanting to keep them out of sight and all - but last night proved to be a special occasion. )
Once that barrage ended, we ceased fire and listened to see what the response was from our interlopers...
well, all the hell-raising and hee-hawing had stopped, but they felt the need to let fly their one apparently last firework, their grand finale I suppose.
Mistake. BIG mistake....

What happened next can only be described as an all-out offensive in the holler. Guns I'd never even heard out here before were let loose, the kind that shakes the ground and chases all fauna from the woods for miles.
I saw tracer fire, heard exploding ordinance, felt the earth move with some of it.
The pitch black sky turned daytime from it all and I kept my hearing protection on even though I had stopped firing anything myself.

In other words, it was glorious.
I imagine the local gun store is gonna have a run on cleaning supplies and ammo for a while.
Have I ever mentioned how much I freaking LOVE it out here?
Happy New Years, y'all.

Love the story, but half expected it to end with anvil firing.

 

[moparedtn]

Love the story, but half expected it to end with anvil firing.

Naw, they do those over at the Appalachian Museum on the 4th: