Never much cared for separate bank accounts etc in a marriage....but....

[YY1]

One of the few things I'm not terribly comfortable with about my significant...

She does almost all of those "free if you sign up..." things, including balance transfers with 0 interest introductory periods.

I will say, though that she stays on top of them and works them to her advantage.

This month is her birthday...and we have so many "free meal on your birthday" coupons that we have to literally mark on a calendar when the window is for each offer. Some are day of birth only, some are week of birthday, some are month of birthday and some are 15 days either way.

We usually leave at least a few on the table as we either run out of time, or appetite, not to mention I have to pay full price for mine!

 

[Hey-O]

Had a friend who went to a bankruptcy hearing with his wife, while she's wearing 25 thousand dollars worth of jewelry she put on credit cards that put them there in the first place. He made 165 thousand a year and was 65 thousand in debt to credit card companies. He asked me what I thought, knowing who I am, he got an ear full!! I have no sympathy for people like that, period. It cost him around 400 a week for three years to climb from under it. They brokered a pay back plan. Stupidest **** I have ever heard of.

 

[HawkRod]

Had a friend who went to a bankruptcy hearing with his wife, while she's wearing 25 thousand dollars worth of jewelry she put on credit cards that put them there in the first place. He made 165 thousand a year and was 65 thousand in debt to credit card companies. He asked me what I thought, knowing who I am, he got an ear full!! I have no sympathy for people like that, period. It cost him around 400 a week for three years to climb from under it. They brokered a pay back plan. Stupidest **** I have ever heard of.

Yeah, I have never understood people that don't make a basic budget. You have to KNOW what you are spending and how it will affect you!

A person makes X amount of dollars per month in income
They have fixed and NEEDED expenses like mortgage/rent, taxes, car loans, etc. Then a person can pretty easily estimate costs for electricity, gas, food, oil/ propane, etc.
Subtract expenses from income. That is the amount left per month you can use for other things, be it jewelry, cars, etc.

If they spend more than that - it isn't going to end well!

 

[YY1]

My wife wears exactly 2 jewelry items (OK technically-3) a pair of silver or gold hoop ear rings and her 1ct wedding ring.

She used have a belly button ring but doesn't any more.

She picked out the wedding ring and we mail ordered it from CA.

Paid $3,200, and six months later it appraised at two different places for 10K.

If she can find 'em like that, she should consider flipping them.

I believe I actually have more pair of shoes (four) than she does.

I believe she has two $10 flea market purses, and they are just big enough for her wallet, phone and one or two other items.

 

[MoparRobTX]

Separate accounts here. 8 years now. We both like it that way.

 

[cosgig]

30 years now and we’ve always had separate accounts. She pays what she agreed to pay, and so do I. She is not your normal girl, she won’t take money even if I offer it to her, so I have to find ways to get her to spend less, such as filling up her car, always paying when we go out, not going in 1/2 on big projects that the house/car/kids need, stuff like that. Happily married and hope to be until I die!

 

[YY1]

That sounds like our money arguments-

She's always trying to give it to me, and I'm always trying to give it to her.

Sometimes we even sneak it into each others wallet/purse.

 

[Richard Cranium]

Since I have Submit under my thumb, she's very well trained to not go wild on buying sprees. It's actually me that SHE has to worry about, especially when I get a hankering for another car. But of course, that's different.

 

[Hey-O]

My wife wears exactly 2 jewelry items (OK technically-3) a pair of silver or gold hoop ear rings and her 1ct wedding ring.

She used have a belly button ring but doesn't any more.

She picked out the wedding ring and we mail ordered it from CA.

Paid $3,200, and six months later it appraised at two different places for 10K.

If she can find 'em like that, she should consider flipping them.

I believe I actually have more pair of shoes (four) than she does.

I believe she has two $10 flea market purses, and they are just big enough for her wallet, phone and one or two other items.

When we got married, she married down. She was more than I deserved and she only saw in me a person that loved and always put her first. I guess for her that was very important and a blessing and gift for me that she saw it that way. I didn't have the money for the rings for us to get married and she refused to go into debt for them. Our rings were a gift from her grandparents, their rings, from their hands to ours. To this day she still doesn't have that big diamond ring that I have offered more times than I can count to buy. Many times with her fighting and kicking, I have taken her to the jeweler and turned her loose. I would sit in a chair and laugh to myself as I watched them dote on her as she was forced by me to look and buy anything and everything that she wanted. Never once has she looked at a big diamond engagement ring, but she has more jewelry than god should allow, as she puts it. She won't hesitate to spend any amount on our kids and myself, she always puts herself last. So spending money on her now, a small price to pay for me, for the mother of my children and my one and only. As I said before, I'm blessed.

 

[ACME A12]

When we got married, she married down. She was more than I deserved and she only saw in me a person that loved and always put her first. I guess for her that was very important and a blessing and gift for me that she saw it that way. I didn't have the money for the rings for us to get married and she refused to go into debt for them. Our rings were a gift from her grandparents, their rings, from their hands to ours. To this day she still doesn't have that big diamond ring that I have offered more times than I can count to buy. Many times with her fighting and kicking, I have taken her the jeweler and turned her loose. I would sit in a chair and laugh to myself as I watched them dote on her as she was forced by me to look and buy anything and everything that she wanted. Never once has she looked at a big diamond engagement ring, but she has more jewelry than god should allow, as she puts it. She won't hesitate to spend any amount on our kids and myself, she always puts herself last. So spending money on her now, a small price to pay for me, for the mother of my children and my one and only. As I said before, I'm blessed.

Amen. Every man should be so lucky.

 

[Duckmanreno]

When we got married, she married down. She was more than I deserved and she only saw in me a person that loved and always put her first. I guess for her that was very important and a blessing and gift for me that she saw it that way. I didn't have the money for the rings for us to get married and she refused to go into debt for them. Our rings were a gift from her grandparents, their rings, from their hands to ours. To this day she still doesn't have that big diamond ring that I have offered more times than I can count to buy. Many times with her fighting and kicking, I have taken her to the jeweler and turned her loose. I would sit in a chair and laugh to myself as I watched them dote on her as she was forced by me to look and buy anything and everything that she wanted. Never once has she looked at a big diamond engagement ring, but she has more jewelry than god should allow, as she puts it. She won't hesitate to spend any amount on our kids and myself, she always puts herself last. So spending money on her now, a small price to pay for me, for the mother of my children and my one and only. As I said before, I'm blessed.

Think of it differently, you married up sir! Sounds like a good relationship

 

[Budnicks]

I don't have that problem, 'probably' won't ever again either

& I never did even with Lisa (RIP)

she did have her own account & credit card for Rodeo/horses related stuff,
but it was a real business (needed to keep them separate)
Just like I did with my racing or my business stuff

 

[chargervert]

38 years married, always had separate finances, I can count on one hand the amount of times we fought over money! Best decision we ever made!

 

[joe smith]

Had a friend who went to a bankruptcy hearing with his wife, while she's wearing 25 thousand dollars worth of jewelry she put on credit cards that put them there in the first place. He made 165 thousand a year and was 65 thousand in debt to credit card companies. He asked me what I thought, knowing who I am, he got an ear full!! I have no sympathy for people like that, period. It cost him around 400 a week for three years to climb from under it. They brokered a pay back plan. Stupidest **** I have ever heard of.

Took my EX wife to court to show what happened to the money in a trust fund her parents set up for our 2 children... ( she had spent all of the 100K for you who want to know)...
The case before mine was a bankruptcy case... The Judge said to the man " This is your YEARLY income, correct"? The guy said " No your honor, it is monthly"..
$86,000 a month, broke and bankrupt.........

 

[hacksaw]

me and mine (my 3rd) both retired and have our own acc and a acc we both put money in for hard times or take a trip with or a night out or whatever. I pay all the household bills and put the rest into my cars or whatever.... not much of that of late tho.... she stocks the fridge and whatever else she wants. came home to new drapes and dinning room set one day.... lol. i learned the hard way with the first 2. .. no matter how in love ya are money will always have a say. .. and if she bails on ya ... poof ya broke and living in a 71 cyclone.

 

[YY1]

I actually helped set my wife up to be independent.

No matter if we separate or if I die.

 

[Hey-O]

When we got married, she married down, I was broke as a joke is my point. She just didn't care as long as we were together and moving forward. I had saved money between the ages of 10 and 16 and after that, it was new cars, wine, women and song till 22. My thought was always if I had a 100 dollars, I really only had 90. 10 percent of everything I ever made went in the market from 22 till I retired at 52. 20 percent from flipping homes was put away, till I sold it all these last few years. It takes two on the same page and a life long commitment. I talk a lot about money, but like we talk about our cars, it was truly a fun hobby for me. Like our cars, I enjoyed building it from start to finish. Sounds stupid I know, once it got started it was just fun to watch. It doesn't matter who pays for what or who has this account or that account, as long as it's all there when needed. The end result!!

 

[hacksaw]

I actually helped set my wife up to be independent.

No matter if we separate or if I die.

my last one i asked to leave i did make sure she had a place to go. helped her find and pay the deposit on her new place..... then walked away.

 

[Pops1967GTX]

 

[moparedtn]

I actually helped set my wife up to be independent.
No matter if we separate or if I die.

Same here - after 4/11/13, my life goals instantly changed to "don't leave her a mess to clean up" .
Despite all sorts of setbacks (some self-inflicted, most not) we're about there now; if I kick now, she'll
be able to bail and head "home" if she likes - or stay put here, which is what she always tells me she
wants to do.

God knows I'm no relationship expert - but this one has stayed loyal through some pretty heavy duty
scary, awful, ugly stuff with me. She's earned my best efforts at doing right by her.